Tag Archives: Friendship

Darby’s Last Day

I woke up extra early this morning, on a Saturday, with a pit in my stomach. Trying not to feel so sick, I looked over to see my dog snoozing on the futon next to my bed. “Good morning, sweet girl,” I said, for the last time.

Before we got Darby in 2004, I was terrified of dogs. 14 years later, I’m terrified of life without one.

She was the runt of her litter, tiny and trampled by her brothers and sisters on the day we got her. I was 8 years old. She was so small that she had to wear a cat collar.

It’s so incredible that we got to spend 14 years with this quirky Coonhound-Doberman mix. Everyone thinks their dog is the best dog, but Darby truly was a once in a lifetime dog. She was so sweet and so funny. She boldly stole chicken nuggets from my plate, gave side-eye when she felt ignored, and would kick golf balls back and forth to herself on the wooden deck. We lived close to the shore. She was afraid of the water, but constantly tried to eat crabs on the beach.

She quickly stole the hearts of my entire family. My mother, who once insisted that our dog would mostly stay outside as her dogs had when she grew up, shared her master bed with Darby. The dog’s preferred sleep number was a solid 25, in case you were wondering.

Darby’s silly yet sweet temperament became the focal point of our whole family dynamic. My parents initially joked that Darby surpassed me in the family ranks. In our four person family, I became #5.

There are so many moments with her I will never forget. When I cried in the weeks before my high school prom, she sat extra close to me and licked my hands. When she revenge-shat on a stack of my laundry (her only real accident in our house, and one that my parents will never not find funny.) The many times I sat in the grass next to her as she outstretched her silky body in the sun. She was a pizza crust vacuum and sass queen.

I liked my dog more than I liked most people. Friends came and went, but I always had my little buddy. Whenever I didn’t want to face unfavorable realities in my life, I’d gloss over them to focus on her. “Well…how is the dog?” I’d say over the phone, when I was at college and didn’t want to have hard conversations.

A few months ago, we found out she had cancer. A mass started to grow in her mouth. I was heartbroken, and I cried in my apartment about the thought of her leaving us. I started coming home from college every weekend, just to get more time with her. As the mass grew, and began to bleed and smell, she mostly was still the same happy-go-lucky dog. A week ago, I watched her hop in the yard after a squirrel as if she was 12 years younger. At my arrival, she would still wap her tail back and forth. At the same time, I realized that she was ready to go, no longer able to go up the stairs by herself, and skipping meals. 14 years is an incredible amount of time to have with a dog. I know that. When I arrived home for our last day together, I noticed the black mass that once hung from her mouth was missing. My mom informed me that it fell off two days ago. She wasn’t in any less pain, but I’m glad that thing fell off. I’m sure she felt more comfortable by its absence. I thought I’d be okay today, knowing how lucky we were to get 14 years, but at around 12:30 I found myself desperately crying to my mother in the kitchen, “Can’t you just cancel it? We can take care of her if she falls again!” As the day ticked by, the countdown aspect of this was extra haunting. I’m not ready to say goodbye yet.

Moving forward, it’s going to be so hard. I’m anticipate a hollow feeling in my household as I pass by all of her favorite places. Even the places where she once puked on the carpet will hold sentiment.

Over the summer, I found a golden, tarnished, heart-shaped locket in my childhood bedroom. The chain broke, so it was just a pendant. It was from fourth grade, and I was so amused. I thought inside there would be some embarrassing remnant of an old crush. Lord knows what fourth grade me could’ve put in there. Would it be Jesse McCartney or the name of a kid in my class? I pried it open to find a picture of Darby in there. My heart’s desire in fourth grade was my dog. I attached the pendant to my bracelet and I’ve worn it every day since.

Darby spent her last day like a queen, with plenty of bacon and belly rubs. I lost an incomparable love from my life today, but god, I am so thankful.

Jimmy Meant To Ruffle Some Hair; Ruffled Feathers Instead

The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon is receiving less than favorable reviews this weekend, following Thursday night’s playful guest segment with Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump.

Host Jimmy Fallon welcomed his guest not out of character–in his typical bubbly fanboy manner–but this time the persona that has enables him to do so well in late night didn’t do him any favors.

During the interview, The Donald and Fallon talk as pals, discussing board games, fast food, his “bromance” with Vladimir Putin, and how he gives the show a lot of material because he says shocking things.

Just for a little review, here’s some shocking things Trump has said.

About women:

“You know it really doesn’t matter what they write, as long as you’ve got a young and beautiful piece of ass.” – to Esquire in 1991.

“There was blood coming out of her eyes… blood coming out of her… wherever.” – to CNN, referencing Fox News debate moderator Megyn Kelly, in 2015.

“Women; You have to treat them like shit.” – to New York magazine in 1992.

His VP nominee Mike Pence has stated that under a Trump Administration landmark decision  Roe v. Wade will be overturned. 

About African-Americans and Jewish people:

“I’ve got black accountants at Trump Castle and at Trump Plaza — black guys counting my money!” “I hate it. The only kind of people I want counting my money are short guys that wear yarmulkes every day. Those are the kind of people I want counting my money. Nobody else. . . . Besides that, I’ve got to tell you something else. I think that the guy is lazy. And it’s probably not his fault because laziness is a trait in blacks. It really is; I believe that. It’s not anything they can control.” -in former employee, Joe O’Donnell’s memoir about working with Trump.

“A well-educated black has a tremendous advantage over a well-educated white in terms of the job market,” Trump said on the program. “I think sometimes a black may think they don’t have an advantage or this and that. I’ve said on one occasion, even about myself, if I were starting off today, I would love to be a well-educated black, because I believe they do have an actual advantage.”Trump said on an NBC-TV special called “Racial Attitudes and Consciousness Exam,” hosted by Bryant Gumbel.

About Mexicans:

“When Mexico sends its people, they’re not sending their best,” Trump said. “They’re sending people that have lots of problems and they’re bringing those problems with us. They’re bringing drugs. They’re bringing crime. They’re rapists.” “And some I assume are good people,” he added.

About Muslims:

“I would hate to do it but it would be something that you’re going to have strongly consider because some of the ideas, some of the hatred—the absolute hatred—is coming from these areas.” -Trump in November when asked if this administration would consider shutting down mosques.

Trump has said he was open to establishing a database for all Muslims living in the U.S.

Also shocking but uncategorized:

Donald Trump also said he believes the world would be much better off if Saddam Hussein and Moammar Gadhafi were still in power.

Though not out of character for the usually friendly Jimmy Fallon, many viewers were off put by his light-heartedness towards Donald Trump and took it straight to Twitter.

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As a long time fan of Jimmy Fallon, scrolling through my timeline today was hard, but I am also not one to blindly-follow, so here is where the discussion begins:

Jimmy Fallon has for a long time branded himself as everyone’s friend. It has worked great for him. He fans over his guests just like anyone would, with “You’re so great”’s and “I love you”’s. See best friend Justin Timberlake’s celebrity impression of him here.

As viewers, this brand makes us too feel like Jimmy is our friend. We share TV dinners with him, occasionally tweet him, watch the show’s snapchat amidst our other friend’s snapchat stories–it feels real. Perhaps this is why so many are upset, Jimmy is a friend who seems to be friends with someone who a lot of people don’t want to be friends with, and he’s okay with that.

Jimmy Fallon is a comedian. He’s not a journalist. Does he have an obligation to fact-check Trump and get serious? Absolutely not. However that doesn’t mean we wouldn’t like him to, you know, at least acknowledge something for the sake of women, POC, and other things threatened by comments Trump has made.

The more I thought about how lightly glossed over the “shocking” things Trump has said was, the more I am confused. When I watched the segment back I was even more bothered watching Fallon throw his hands back in laughter when Trump says Monopoly was his favorite game (Was it really THAT funny?).

It also got me thinking, how come Fallon hasn’t said anything? I understand that he tries to remain neutral, but he doesn’t really have to do that. Just a timeslot later, Seth Meyers does it. He has a Closer Look segment on Trump almost every week. Samantha Bee does it on TBS. Stephen Colbert and John Stewart have done it. John Oliver has done it. So, why not Jimmy? Jimmy, a friend of everyone, a friend of women, POC, and a friend to many that Trump has said some “shocking” things about. I can’t For help but wonder how The Roots felt during all of this, as someone who hasn’t condemned the KKK’s support of himself sat across them on stage and joked around with their friend Jimmy. Weird, right?

Jimmy Fallon meant to ruffle his hands through Trump’s infamous hair, but in doing so he ruffled a lot of feathers. I truly wonder if he will address this and how The Tonight Show will choose to move forward. I doubt this will turn away viewers from watching the show, but it certainly has a left a bad taste in some mouths.